The Jon Dore Television Show Episode Guide, Season 2

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Jon Gets Old
Trying to impress some idiot kids at the skate park, Jon stands tall in his 80's roller disco outfit complete with fur covered roller skates and headband. He wipes out and after sliding on his face across the cruel cement, Jon begins to realize that he's not as young as he used to be. To prepare for his old age, Jon visits a community center for old folks where we see someone lose a limb or two, at least one fatality and a romantic twist that will leave stomachs heaving for years to come.

Jon Gets Horny
At a friend's funeral, Jon is amazed by how horny he has become. Sporting a prominent erection, Jon awkwardly flees the church and meets Crissy: the sexy, curvy, crazy woman of his stupid dreams. No matter how much sex he has, though, Jon cannot lose the hard-on that controls him. To explore his relentless horniness, Jon becomes an internet porn star. In a touching and heart-warming ending, Jon teaches us all the true meaning of sex with inanimate objects.

Jon Fights Discrimination
When he is told that he must pay to enter a club on Ladies Night, Jon is inspired to fight for the rights of white heterosexual men everywhere and put an end to millions of years of discrimination. To really feel the chill of society's intolerance, Jon disguises himself as a multi-racial, overweight, half-blind, red-haired woman with a snake for a tail and takes to the streets. In a powerful, thought-provoking demonstration of his plan to end discrimination, Jon learns a powerful lesson about the importance of not being as dumb as a headless lemur.

Jon Saves The Planet
After burning his garbage outside his apartment, Jon is warned by Larry the Creepy Janitor that Jon's lifestyle is helping to destroy the planet. To find out how to save the planet from people like himself, Jon visits an eco-friendly farm where he learns that animals do not start out on Styrofoam plates, wrapped in plastic. Though Jon fails spectacularly as an environmentalist, he teaches us that a little knowledge is a truly dangerous thing, and that pissing yourself in front of an audience isn't funny when it's happening to you.

Jon Has A Medical Scare
At last, we get to see Jon Dore's colon! When the episode begins, Jon is giddy about a party he attended the night before. Suddenly, he is overwhelmed by a terrible pain in his gut. Fearful of seeing a doctor, Jon tries to solve the mystery pain himself. When even his Aunt Kathy, a retired nurse, can't help him, Jon finally sees a doctor and surrenders to a colonoscopy. The first comedian to explore his own colon on national television, Jon remains to this day, staunchly unashamed of himself.

Jon Lives A Lie
Tormented by the memory of the night he cheated on his girlfriend, Jon explores the misery of living a lie. See Jon Dore lead a procession of liars through the streets in a twisted pride parade! Gasp with delight as Jon imagines his girlfriend's violent revenge that leads to his testicles smoking on the bedroom floor! Squeal with interest as Jon discovers the truth about the night he cheated! It's the most compelling half-hour of television ever made by Jon Dore and his band of goons.

Jon Fights Violence
When Jon kicks his soundman in the balls for making a minor mistake on set, he is accused of being too violent. Amazed that anyone could find fault with him, Jon sets out to discover the true nature of violence. Are we born violent? Is a kick in the balls a prelude to nuclear annihilation? Can a human head be reattached with a little thread and carpenter's glue? In this action-packed episode, Jon learns that violence is never the answer, no matter how funny it may be to see someone get tagged in the nuts.

Jon Needs Cash Quick
When Jon's invited to a stag party in Vegas, he realizes he needs cash, and quick! To get it, he conjures up various ill-conceived plans like having a yard sale, selling his blood on the side of the road and prostitution, to no avail. In this thought-provoking and unforgettable episode, Jon manages to answer the question, "What's up with money, anyway?" So when his bizarre moneymaking invention causes chaos on the city streets, Jon learns that thinking is best left to the professionals.

Jon Gets Competitive
When Jon's bowling team accuses him of not being competitive enough, Jon doesn't see what the big deal is, so they kick him off the team. After being shamefully dismissed, Jon vows to learn how to be more competitive. Inspired by a pregnant woman in her 70s, Jon realizes it's never too late to get obnoxious. So he sets out to learn trash talk from basketball players and transforms into a bloodthirsty competitor. With a fresh, fierce attitude, Jon forms a new team for the big game finale, but his new attitude has a strange effect on his old teammates.

Jon Gets Haunted
Alone at night, Jon hears what sounds like breathing in the walls of his apartment. Believing that his apartment is haunted, Jon consults a ghost researcher and a psychic reader. He ultimately decides to make peace and maybe even get it on with the restless spirit. In a shocking and brain-melting ending that will change humanity forever, Jon learns the shocking truth about the disembodied voice.

Jon Wants Justice
When he discovers his bleach-stained clothes in the laundry room of his building, Jon wants justice - extreme justice! Fueled by revenge, Jon plays detective and determines that his prime suspect is "The Man in White". In a scene too shocking for civilized people, Jon exacts his revenge in a bizarre and extraordinary way. So what if he has the wrong man? It's funny.

Jon's Christmas
When he doesn't get what he wants for Christmas, Jon is pissed. Taking matters into his own hands, Jon confronts that rotund demon, Santa Claus, and a bloody brawl ensues. In this instant holiday classic, beloved comedian and humanitarian, Jon Dore, teaches us all the true meaning of Christmas. With an ending that will undoubtedly melt even the coldest heart, this very special episode is destined to replace "It's a Wonderful Life" as the most watched holiday show of all time.

Jon Does Drugs
Known to police as a tireless soldier in the war on drugs, Jon assists in the arrest of a pot smoker. When Jon learns about the medicinal uses of marijuana from his sickly neighbour, he's profoundly confused. Why are some drugs legal and others not? Deciding that the only way to understand the true effects of narcotics, Jon tries them all at once. In this harrowing and unflinching look at the drug subculture, Jon learns an important lesson about not peeing on his neighbours.